Please post......

If there is something you want to talk about, i will help you. I know that i was going to shut this down, but i can't. If i can reach one person. I have succeeded,  please just a hello post to let me know that i make you want to visit again. {HUGS}.

Goodbye

this is goodbye...i wish you all the best....i failed at this....thank you for all that has supported me....Kim

I finally broke down and went to the ER.....

Yes i did, I have an ulcer. I also have a bacteria called H Pyloria. It causes ulcers. I have meds that i have to take for 14 days and i should be good as new. Please help me pray that it helps, i also have GERD, i will have it the rest of my life. I prayed the whole way to the ER about test, i was going to step up and do them if i had to because i was tired of hurting. But all he did was blood work. Sorry i have not been around much i have been busy and just so tired. I have been so depressed lately, and i have to go to the Dr. tomorrow and i'am afraid to tell him that because i have finally got down to seeing him every 2 mnths, and i don't want to back up. Because he really does not help me, i help me get better, and spring is coming and i'am so looking forward to that going to get the yard nice and take the boys swimming. I will not be in this house like i was last summer. I bought a swim suit it still has the tags on it. I will be going this summer, and i can't wait till my sister comes out. I miss talking to her she is so busy these days, but we were close. I will text her she will text me back and i answer and she never answers back it hurts, because she is my rock.  Please help me pray that i don't hurt tonight. I think that i ate to much and i'am so scared that it is going to hurt and ya'll it hurts so bad. And it last from 4 to 6 to 8 hrs. I ate early and took my meds already so maybe that med will calm it. I'am sorry to be such a baby, but it hurts and i know there are people that come here that pray and i know that you will remember me in prayer.




This week has started out ok, i'am alive, i'am healthy, i have my family here. I could not ask for more at this time.  HUGS to all of you!!!!!

Just Thinking...........

I'm sitting here thinking how much it would mean to me not to have any troubles. I mean i know that us adults have them. We worry a lot in my case i worry a lot. I see my boys so happy, they are doing so well in School. I'm just a proud mom, and they had to be given a mom that hardly leaves the house. On had a track meet i could not go i had a horrible attack with my stomach last night it started at about 9 last night and woke me up on and off till about 4. I woke up and felt as though someone had beat me in the tummy, on of the worst. All i had to depend on was my boys and they tried to help me, it was all i could do to get their things ready for School. When i lye down it hurts worse.

Depression this week a bad week on being depressed. I don't know you guys, i just want to get better. I need to get my vitamin b shots but we can't afford them. So I will have to start all over again to keep the levels up, and i hate that because i was doing better. Please post let me know you are getting something out of what i write. {HUGS}

Hello..........

How have you all been? me OK, i have been dealing with tummy problems. I go to the Dr. next week and i think that I'm going to up the meds. I have no desire to do anything. Not having any money to do anything with my boys does not help. But they understand. My husband got a great job offer and has yet to call him, GOD does he not realize what he is doing to us. We are sinking and sinking fast. Guys I have done a lot of soul searching, and as soon as i find out about making money I'm out, he isn't trying. I can do this on my own. I have done it several times before, and i have failed, but I'm determined to be happy. Life is not suppose to be this way. It hurts and it is not suppose to. I know that a lot of readers are wondering "why don't she go to work" I wish i could truly answer that i have a good reason i just can't share it. please support me through this hard time in my life because i have no one else.......

My home life this week......

Things here are OK this week so far,subject to change at anytime. I had to take my youngest to the DR. he was a solid whelp, he has strep. So nursing him back to health, I hate it when my babies are sick. My anxiety has been up this weekend. My oldest son is joining the Air Force, and I'm so scared for him, and happy that he has taken it open himself to better himself. He is actually lost in this world, he just doesn't feel good enough and we give him so much to make himself feel better, but we are his parents we are suppose to do that. I think that we all said that to our parents as a child. I had a bad day yesterday, I cried at the drop of a hat. But it made me feel better, and having to make myself get out of the house to take my son to the Dr. helped me. Yes i have to made to leave this house. I'm so hoping that when summer gets here it will be totally different and i can share exiting things i do that day instead of just being here.Thank you all for the support that i get here. I mean i know that i don't get a lot of posting, but i hope you will post if you need to. Please know each and everyone of you are in my heart and we made this site together. I may up my meds when i go to the Dr. this month. Maybe i will come out of the depression that i fight daily. But i fight and that is a good thing. I will post later if I'm still up, if not I will see you in the A.M. {HUGS}

Sad.........

Hello everyone. Sorry I didn't post yesterday, I missed posting. I have just been wrapped up in a lot of things.... and i guess that i have just had writers  block. I have had some family problems, my granny was in the hospital. She is ok. I don't go see her as i should, but i'am going to be honest, with this wavy eyes that happens when i am about to get a headache they have been happening a lot lately and i am afraid of driving alone. I WILL not put my boys in danger, I  would have to pull over for the 30 minutes or so till it goes away. I don't know, I miss my mom and my dad, she is hurt at me, I just wish that she knew what i felt, no one understands what I go through. I may not understand what she is going through either. I have just became a hermit. I hate to leave the house. I feel safe just being in my room. NO!! that is no way to live at all. I hurt knowing that I hurt someone that I care about. I said I was sorry.........

HI...................

Hi everyone....it is late where i'am. I just can't go to bed without posting. I have dedicated myself to this site. Today I have been down, I kinda ask myself why are you writing to help others, and I get down, but I want people to see that I'am human and have things in my life that are not good. My home life is a huge heart break for me. I cry for my younger boys they are so much my life, they have no where to run when things get rough. I don't have the gas most of the times and really no where to go, I have no friends. Me and them go in our room and watch TV or talk. It is amazing how smart they are. My oldest boys can go to friends houses and it hurts my heart that they are not here. But I don't blame them.




I maybe throwing myself a pity party tonight, and I have invited you all. Thanks for coming. And know that we can do this all together. If you feel like posting please do. If you are a reader please come back. I will post in the A.M when I get my angels off to School. {HUGS}

Sorry.....

Just not feeling it today..... really down. Please understand maybe tomorrow will be better. {HUGS} to you all!..........Kim

Morning........

Good Morning everyone. Today I'm going to try to get out of the house. If you have not been out try to go for a walk. Visit a friend. That is what I'm going to do. I have to be sure that I have a ride, because with the gas prices, and no money coming in we can run only one vehicle. It's a sad situation. Looks as though I'm going to try to look harder for a job, it is hard to work with this disorder, I have tried. I do good for awhile, and then I make myself mentally and physically sick. I'm not using it as an excuse to not work, I just know how it makes me. It is hard to see your therapist every month, I don't know I just get so discouraged, and angry at myself because I can't be normal. Please know that I'm blessed to have all of you that visit, and post it means the world to me. Will check back a little later, God Bless.